Deck Doctor: Teysa, Orzhov Scion

I’m working on a newly revised and updated Thraximundar list, but I have been too broke to acquire the new M13 cards I want for it – and considering it was the handful of Grixis goodies in M13 that inspired the deck in the first place, I want to wait until I have what I need to build the deck as I envisioned it, rather than cobble it together from substitutes and stand-ins. Other than this pending deck idea, my stable of EDH decks has been unusually stable. They are all meeting my performance expectations and are fun to play – so, I haven’t really been moved to build anything new, take anything apart, or make serious changes to them.

So, in the meantime, I’ve been scratching my deck-building itch by tweaking other people’s lists. I like doing these “Deck Doctor” articles because I like helping other players step up their game, as it makes games more fun for me if all the players involved have a fair shot at winning – or, failing that, at least getting to make a couple of big, epic plays before going out in a blaze of glory!

Anyway, to that end, I’m going to take a critical eye to a friend’s Teysa deck, and see if I can help her whip it into shape. It’s been stumbling a lot in the early game, from what I’ve seen of it in action, but if she can survive until the late game, the deck has proven capable of throwing some haymakers.

So, let’s take a look at what we’re working with first:

Teysa, Orzhov Scion

Plated Pegasus

Twilight Drover

Mentor of the Meek

Seraph of Dawn

False Prophet

Belfry Spirit

Geist-Honored Monk

Avacyn, Angel of Hope

Viscera Seer

Black Cat

Kalastria Highborn

Gatekeeper of Malakir

Hypnotic Specter

Needle Specter

Liliana's Specter

Vampire Nighthawk

Mirri the Cursed

Massacre Wurm

Mikaeus, the Unhallowed

Butcher of Malakir

Griselbrand

Vish Kal, Blood Arbiter

Elspeth Tirel

Liliana Vess

Sorin, Lord of Innistrad

Swords to Plowshares

Path to Exile

Disenchant

Raise the Alarm

Sacred Mesa

Lingering Souls

Resurrection

Join the Ranks

Austere Command

Planar Cleansing

Storm Herd

Bloodchief Ascension

Liliana's Caress

Demonic Tutor

Diabolic Intent

Go for the Throat

Hymn to Tourach

Words of Waste

Megrim

Underworld Dreams

Syphon Mind

Damnation

Grave Pact

Painful Quandary

Profane Command

Skullclamp

Lightning Greaves

Vessel of Endless Rest

Tormod's Crypt

Claws of Gix

Mimic Vat

Otherworld Atlas

Font of Mythos

Geth's Grimoire

Barren Moor

Terramorphic Expanse

Caves of Koilos

Orzhov Basilica

Seraph Sanctuary

Secluded Steppe

Drifting Meadow

Forbidding Watchtower

Volrath's Stronghold

High Market

Phyrexian Tower

Strip Mine

Shizo, Death's Storehouse

Bojuka Bog

Godless Shrine

12x Swamp

13x Plains

So… there’s a lot to do here. I’m going to start by making a quick pass, just swapping in value upgrades – that is to say, cards that fill the same roll as what they’re replacing, but are just pound-for-pound better options. I’ll start with an easy one, so you get the gist.

Out: Gatekeeper of Malakir

In: Fleshbag Marauder

Gatekeeper is okay in 1v1 games, but absolute SHIT in 4-way multiplayer games. Not to mention, 2B to cast is far, far easier on a budget two-color mana base than BBB. Even with all the duals in the world, hitting BBB consistently when you need it is a tall order. But the real value is that Fleshbag just flat out has WAY more power for the same CMC. This is a strict value upgrade – both cards do the same thing, but one of them does it about 100 times better.

Out: Kalastria Highborn

In: Blood Artist

Replacing one vampire with another, the Highborn has a few issues. There aren’t enough Vampires in the deck to make her worthwile, she requires you to leave Black mana open at all times to be useful, and she only triggers on YOUR stuff dying. Blood Artist solves ALL of these problems. Nevermind that he’s a 0/1 – when’s the last time you saw a Highborn attack in EDH?

Out: Disenchant

In: Mortify

Yeah, our General should provide plenty of creature removal, but sometimes she won’t. Disenchant is just too… “meh” in EDH. Mortify at least gives you some more versatility. I’d also accept Return to Dust or Terashi’s Grasp for options that are just flat out better than Disenchant.

Out: Go For the Throat

In: Shriekmaw

In a vacuum, these two are very close to being identical. Shriekmaw has the benefit of being a creature, while Go For the Throat has a much less restrictive targeting condition. Of the two, Throat is probably marginally better. In a vacuum. However, in light of our General, Black creatures that sac themselves leave behind a 1/1 White Spirit token, which can later be used to kill something else. So, I’d rather have Shriekmaw here for the interaction with Teysa.

Out: Resurrection

In: Rise From the Grave

If we’re going to play a one-shot Zombify effect, we want to go with versatility and synergy over the most basic effect. Rise From the Grave is better for two reasons: One, we can steal from ANY graveyard, not just our own, and Two, it makes the creature Black, ensuring that when it dies, it’ll leave a 1/1 spirit behind, as long as Teysa is in play. Those two factors make that one extra mana seem well worth it, no?

(I would also accept Beacon of Unrest, Puppeteer Clique or Geth Lord of the Vault in this slot!)

Out: Painful Quandary

In: Exquisite Blood

This one is a bit less obvious – the two cards don’t really do the same thing, at all. They’re both 5 CMC Black Enchantments with “griefer” stamped across them – however, without combo-ing off with Blood, it’s far, FAR less likely to get you hated out of the game, whereas Quandary pretty much always makes you Public Enemy #1 the second you play it. (Plus the life gain will be important later… trust me).

Out: Raise the Alarm, Join the Ranks

In: Cloudgoat Ranger, Requiem Angel

Removing two very mediocre token producers in favor of two much-better token makers. They’re more expensive, but totally worth it. These sorts of “army in a can” cards are infinitely more valuable with Teysa than a one-shot Raise the Alarm. Cloadgoat gets you all three tokens to Exile something right away, instead of getting you 2/3 there and stopping, plus he leaves behind an okay-sized body after the fact. Better, if you don’t need to kill something right away, the Ranger swings as a 5/3 Flyer – not too shabby. Requiem Angel is just an engine of value, and will usually get killed on sight – but when she does stick, she’ll help propel Teysa into a rapid-fire Exile machine gun!

Okay, those are the straight one-for-one swaps. Now we’re going to need to dig in and do some real structural renovation. The first thing I want to do is address the mana issues I’ve seen this deck suffer through lately. 40 lands and almost no ramp whatsoever should be fine, mathematically, over a large number of games… but I’ve seen this deck either choke on mana flood, or lag behind the rest of the table in every game I’ve played against it. I’m going to start by cutting two lands, dropping the count to 38 – this will help keep mana flooding to a minimum. At the same time, I’m going to bolster artifact mana, and mana-fetching effects to smooth out draws and keep mana screw at bay.

Out: Plated Pegasus, Seraph of the Dawn, Otherwold Atlas, Font of Mythos, Seraph Sanctuary, 1x Plains

In: Solemn Simulacrum, Liliana’s Shade, Kor Cartographer, Sol Ring, Orzhov Signet, Armillary Sphere

Ideallly, Land Tax would come in, but it’s out of budget for the time being. Armillary Sphere is actually a really good substitute. Ensures multiple land drops now, while thinning the deck to draw stuff that matters later.

Next, I want to continue to upgrade our token-making capabilities to better utilize our General. We need a steady supply of tokens that we can sac to Teysa without costing us huge amounts of card advantage.

Out: Black Cat, Hypnotic Specter, Needle Specter

In: Bloodline Keeper, Emeria Angel, Grave Titan

As you can see, I’m phasing out most of the discard, especially the Specters. Some of that will remain – Liliana’s Specter is actually quite good here – but stuff like Hypnotic Specter might as well say “1BB: Do Nothing”  99% of the time, in EDH. They’re terribly outclassed in the format.

Meanwhile, the three includes are all more of those “army in a can” value engines. They can all power out a limitless supply of token fodder for Teysa under the right conditions. Yes, all of them carry huge “shoot on sight” targets on their heads, but that’s why we need ALL of them: eventually your opponents will run out of removal and one will stick.

As mentioned above, most of the discard is going to wind up getting cut. There are a few gems here, though, and I want to supplement those with a couple of better, more Multiplayer-friendly options.

Out: Hymn to Tourach, Megrim

In: Unnerve, Scythe Specter

Unnerve does more with a single spell slot than most of the rest of the discard effects originally in the deck. It’s going to be a 6-for-1 nearly every time you cast this in a 4-way game. CARD ADVANTAGE WINS GAMES, as the old adage goes.

 Speaking of card advantage, drawing cards is pretty darn important. We’ve got Skullclamp, Mentor of the Meek, and Griselbrand to help with that job. All three are good, solid options, but Griselbrand is banned now, so we need to replace him.

Out: Griselbrand, Underworld Dreams

In: Bloodgift Demon, Phyrexian Arena

Phyrexian Arena has long been THE gold standard for card draw in Black, and Bloodgift Demon is arguably even better. Both are absolutely essential to this deck’s draw package. Meanwhile Griselbees takes his seat on the bench, while Underworld Dreams gets the axe because, let’s face it, you’re never really going to win with Dreams in a deck that doesn’t have access to Wheel of Fortune/Windfall effects. It’s better to draw more cards yourself than to give opponents cards and punish them slightly for it. This is just the wrong deck and wrong colors to push an Underworld Dreams strategy.

Now, there are two minor themes that are present here, that are missing one of the three pieces of that theme…

We have Grave Pact and Butcher of Malakir, but we’re missing the White version of Grave Pact: Martyr’s Bond. If you’re running two Grave Pacts, there’s literally no reason you wouldn’t run three, so Bond comes in.Similarly, we have Blood Artist and Massacre Wurm, both of which kill your opponents as you kill their dudes, but Falkenrath Noble completes the “trilogy” of creatures with that effect. So…

Out: Geth’s Grimoire, Mirri the Cursed

In: Martyr’s Bond, Falkenrath Noble

The Grimoire no longer holds any appeal, as we’ve streamlined the discard and included some much more reliable sources of card draw. I love Mirri the Cursed, but compared to Falkenrath Noble, well.. the Noble is vastly more likely to win you a game, or at least keep you alive long enough to win. Sticking Blood Artist and the Noble at the same time will make it virtually suicidal for your opponents to Wrath the board.

Finally, I have one last change to make:

Out: Liliana’s Caress

In: Dimir House Guard

Dimir House Guard can tutor up quite a few important, key cards such as Grave Pact of Falkenrath Noble, or it can be used as a free sac outlet, which can be pretty useful in a Teysa deck.

Compiling all of these changes into a revised decklist, we wind up with the following 100 cards:

Twilight Drover

Mentor of the Meek

Kor Cartographer

False Prophet

Emeria Angel

Belfry Spirit

Cloudgoat Ranger

Geist-Honored Monk

Requiem Angel

Avacyn, Angel of Hope

Viscera Seer

Blood Artist

Fleshbag Marauder

Liliana's Specter

Vampire Nighthawk

Falkenrath Noble

Dimir House Guard

Bloodline Keeper

Liliana's Shade

Shriekmaw

Bloodgift Demon

Scythe Specter

Grave Titan

Massacre Wurm

Mikaeus, the Unhallowed

Butcher of Malakir

Teysa, Orzhov Scion

Vish Kal, Blood Arbiter

Solemn Simulacrum

Swords to Plowshares

Path to Exile

Sacred Mesa

Lingering Souls

Elspeth Tirel

Martyr's Bond

Austere Command

Planar Cleansing

Storm Herd

Bloodchief Ascension

Demonic Tutor

Diabolic Intent

Words of Waste

Phyrexian Arena

Unnerve

Syphon Mind

Damnation

Grave Pact

Rise From the Grave

Exquisite Blood

Liliana Vess

Profane Command

Mortify

Sorin, Lord of Innistrad

Sol Ring

Orzhov Signet

Armillary Sphere

Vessel of Endless Rest

Skullclamp

Lightning Greaves

Tormod's Crypt

Claws of Gix

Mimic Vat

Barren Moor

Terramorphic Expanse

Caves of Koilos

Orzhov Basilica

Secluded Steppe

Drifting Meadow

Forbidding Watchtower

Volrath's Stronghold

High Market

Phyrexian Tower

Strip Mine

Shizo, Death's Storehouse

Bojuka Bog

Godless Shrine

12x Swamp

12x Plains

I think my work here is pretty much done. I am very happy with the changes made, though there are a few things I’d really like to try and squeeze in, depending on this deck owner’s card pool:

Bloodghast – Sure, the Skullclamp+Bloodghast combo is a little well-worn by now, but A) this deck really needs all the draw it can get, and B) it’s actually synergistic and on-theme with our General, making the ClampGhast tech less about “Good stuff” and actually a tech-y inclusion.

Angel of Despair – Um, not really doing anything with the theme, but this is simply one of the best Orzhov cards ever printed.

Vindicate – THE best Orzhov card ever printed, but this is almost certainly out of our budget. L

Decree of Pain – One of the best Wrath variants ever, and great for a deck starved for card-draw

Harvester of Souls – With the deck’s focus on tokens and Exiling things, this guy might not trigger often enough, but it might, too.

Captain of the Watch – Not really enough Soldier stuff to really make this compelling, but it IS 9 power for 6 mana, and supplies more than enough guys for Teysa to do her thing once.

Kjeldoran Outpost – The one non-basic I’d add first. Land-based token making is good, and this is pretty cheap too.

And, that wraps up this Deck Doctor look at Teysa, Ozhov Scion. Enjoy!